Reflections

There's a song called "God of Justice" by Tim Hughes. It pretty much became our prayer this summer.  The chorus says:

                 We must go

                 Live to feed the hungry

                 Stand beside the broken

                 We must go

                 Stepping forward keep us from just singing

                 Move us into action
                  We must go

What I didn't realize in praying that was God was going to do it and use us.  I didn't know that when I prayed to stand beside the broken, what that would mean. It meant sitting on a porch near the mission, hanging out with two 11 year old boys and letting them be kids.  It meant reassuring them that the beatings they received almost daily weren't what God wanted for them.  It meant seeing those scars and circling that God would change that situation.  And he did, at least for a little while because they went to Port au Prince to visit family. For a few weeks, they didn't have to deal with that.

It meant seeing a girl on the porch next to where I lived in the Mole.  Every time we passed, we would greet her but she never lifted her head.  I learned that this "girl" was in fact a thirty year old woman.  She was given as a slave to repay her father's debt.  She was beaten, told she was worthless.  She had cuts all over her body. Eventually, she started responding to me and Morgan.  In the afternoons, we would go and sit with her.  We prayed with her and bandaged those wounds, but in reality, we weren't healing her physically. I didn't know that it meant sending time with someone who had their arm broken; yet, still has the faith that God's in control.

I didn't know that it would mean spending an entire day loving on 8-12 year old girls, telling them of God's love story for them.  Only for one of them to ask if that was really true, because her parents have never told her she was beautiful.

I didn't know it would mean loving a girl whose joy was unspeakable. Fedna is eight and special. Her family left her outside their home naked all day, letting people do whatever they wanted to her.  The mission intervened for Fedna.  Despite everything that's happened, Fedna is one of the happiest kids I've ever met and all she wants is high fives from you!

It meant in one conversation with a single mother, God would break me. In the village of Preskul, we were going hut to hut visiting with the families. This young mother with several kids said she wanted us to pray that she would continue to trust God.  I wasn't prepared for what came next.  She lifted the shirt that her 2 year old son was wearing.  He had a rope tied tightly around his stomach.  She didn't have enough food, so she fed him what she could and then tied the rope so he wouldn't feel the hunger pains.

I learned this summer, no matter how hard I tried to fight God on certain things, he's going to doing it one way or another. I didn't want to accept the reality of the things he was teaching me and showing me, but I knew it was the right step. I knew what that would entail and it scared me, it still does.  But I've learned that I never have to do this alone.  The LORD is faithful in his leading.  It's a land of unknowns but I can rest assured that the one leading me does know.